All Hallows
by DrawMeASheep
Summary: Ziva and McGee discuss their Halloween plans, post Cracked.


Disclaimer: Party at my place. Bring booze. No hamsters.

Spoilers: Subplot spoilers for _Cracked_.

Summary: Ziva and McGee, and later Abby, chat about Halloween plans.

* * *

Ziva, having finally reached a point where she could stop laughing out loud when she pictured Tony in his 'role-playing' costume, raised an eyebrow in McGee's direction. "So…"

He grinned back at her. "I just emailed you the security footage."

She lost her train of thought for a further five minutes as she watched Tony strut on her computer screen; thankfully, there was no sound, so she didn't have to listen to his strange accent again. "I am sure there are regulations that will prevent us from posting this on the Internet."

"Unfortunately, the security tapes are NCIS property and therefore subject to oversight. The footage from my cell phone however…"

"Your cell phone did not leave your pocket."

"Of course you noticed that, but do you think Tony did?"

She laughed for non-video related reasons. "I suspect we will not be paying for lunch on Monday."

"I was thinking for the whole next week."

"Do not push it, McGee. Even Tony has his limits."

"You're right. Better one free lunch than an exposed empty threat."

She nodded and turned back to her computer, her willpower weakening. At least there were no explicit rules preventing her from keeping a copy of the video for potential future use or even simple personal enjoyment. One thing still bothered her, though. "I think that perhaps I have misunderstood the idea of role-playing."

McGee shrugged. "I think maybe Ethel was just trying to trick him into taking her to a Halloween party." Tony was suddenly strutting on all the plasma screens in the bullpen. "You have to admit, the wig really completes the costume."

"It seems very strange to me."

"Well, it is Tony."

"True. But I was under the impression that role-playing was more sexual than simply dressing up as characters from old movies. Something like 'stripper' or 'naughty nurse' would be more appropriate, yes?"

His eyes went wide. "I…I guess that would depend on your definition of 'appropriate.'"

She took another stab at it. "Traditional?"

"Er." The image of Tony in his white suit immediately disappeared from the screens. "Um, speaking of traditions, do you have any plans for Halloween?"

"Ducky asked me to assist him in distributing candy to children, as I have never done it. He suggested I ask each child who they are, although I do not understand why I would need their names."

"I think he probably meant you should ask who they're dressed as so it looks like you're showing interest."

"Oh." She felt slightly flustered by the obviousness of McGee's explanation. If anything, she would expect the parents to demand who she was, as she was the stranger giving their children candy. Best to just let these things go and accept that baseball was enough Americanization for one month. She asked, "Do you have plans, McGee?"

"Nope. Abby invited me to a party, but I learned my lesson on that one." He shivered in his chair, so Ziva didn't inquire further. "I was just planning to stay home and wait for the inevitable call out."

"I did not think we were on call this weekend."

"We're not, but that doesn't mean we won't have to work when things get crazy. He may be off somewhere in a polyester leisure suit, but Tony does have a good point about weird things happening on Halloween."

She waved him off. "That is just superstition. If we compiled a list of our cases over the past five years, I do not think they would be significantly stranger than on Halloween. For example, during my first case with the team, we discovered a mummified hand in a safety deposit box, and that was not on Halloween."

"Yes, but…"

"And the body parts smuggling ring?"

"Okay, but…"

"The frozen corpse coming back to life?"

"Ziva, please…"

"What about the man who eviscerated his girlfriend's father to make her feel that she needed him?"

"Stop it!" He really was starting to squirm and blanch. "You're making me feel like I work in a _Saw_ movie."

Ziva blinked, confused; McGee's grammar was usually so good. She decided to ignore the slip and feigned interest, since the explanation was unlikely to be exhaustive. "Saw what movie?"

"_Saw_. Any of them, really."

"What am I supposed to have seen?"

"_Saw_. It's a movie. A horror movie franchise, really. I'm sure Tony could do a better job explaining it to you."

"I still do not understand what…"

"Ziva, as much as I'd like to get into a 'Who's on First?' routine with you, I'm just going to stop you. The name of the movie is _Saw_. Like the tool."

"Why did you not just say so?"

He cocked his head and eyeballed her. "Aren't you supposed to be going over to Ducky's to pass out candy?"

They were interrupted an unusually dressed Abby strode into the bullpen. "Just wanted to stop by and invite you guys to the party I'm headed to. You guys can totally throw on some jumpsuits and go as NCIS techs if you don't have costumes! Or even just wear your badges and guns and pretend you're in costumes!"

"Speaking of costumes…" McGee began, "You, um…"

Abby brushed the lapel of her tailored pantsuit. "You don't like it?"

"Well, I just…are you supposed to be an investment banker or a lawyer or something?"

"No!"

"Well, then…what?"

"McGee, I'm wearing an expensive suit, more expensive but borrowed shoes and I'm holding a cell phone and a little black book." She tapped her impeccably shod foot and attempted to toss her hair. "The only thing I don't have is dirt on every powerful penis-owning person in Washington!"

Ziva decided to come to McGee's rescue. "I think you make an excellent Holly Snow, Abby."

"See? Ziva gets my costume." Abby wrapped an arm around her shoulders as Ziva approached. "The shoes really are cute. I may even have to borrow them again the next time I go to court. Unless she likes my boots so much that she doesn't want to trade back, which I would be totally okay with."

McGee, who did not have as clear a view of the shoes as Ziva did, asked dubiously, "Trade with who?"

"Oh, I didn't tell you the best part. I'm going to a party as Holly, and Holly is going as Abby!"

He choked on nothing. "You're going to a party with Holly Snow?"

Ziva retreated to her desk as Abby replied, "Don't be silly, McGee. Separate parties."

"Should I even ask how this came about?"

"Well, we were chatting about our Halloween plans and…"

"_Chatting_?"

"Email, McGee. It's not like we get together for coffee once a week. Anyway, she was saying how she thought 'Goth lab wonder girl' would be a great costume and I thought, 'Yeah, because DC Madam isn't a good one' and things went from there."

McGee seemed stuck. "I don't understand why you would have any contact with Holly Snow."

"She's interesting."

"What do you even talk about, besides Halloween costumes?"

"Oh, clothes, hair, Gibbs, shoes…y'know, typical girly stuff. Right, so if you guys aren't going to be fun, I've really gotta get going if I want to get there before all the dry ice has sublimated from the punch."

Ziva shook her head as she checked her watch; still ten minutes before she had to leave for Ducky's. "You should take McGee. He is going as Tony."

Abby took a step back. "D minus for effort, Timmy. I could maybe buy the shirt, but the suit and shoes are all wrong. And you need a tie."

McGee frowned severely. "I'm not Tony and I have no idea why Ziva even thought…"

"It was the movie references and attitude, Mc…Mc…hm. That is surprisingly difficult. We will just pretend I insulted you with a clever nickname and call it a night, yes?"

Abby was jumping into the elevator a moment later with a shouted, 'Happy Halloween!' She was long gone by the time Ziva and McGee walked across the rapidly darkening parking lot. He had been a bit standoffish since she had accused him of being Tony, so she extended an olive branch. "I am sure Ducky would be very happy to have you over as well, if you would like to…"

"Nah, I have to get home to walk Jethro. But thanks. We'll probably be seeing each other again by midnight, anyway." He wiggled his fingers in front of his face. "Y'know, Halloween."

She was about to answer when her phone vibrated in her pocket and she read the text, _Thought Disco was dead. I was wrong. Need a hit. U know anyone? _

McGee was waving from behind the closed window of his car as he pulled out when she looked up. She texted back with the only appropriate comment she could think of – _It is Stayin Alive, Tony._

She didn't get a reply, though she did check her phone after handing candy to several diminutive ninjas at Ducky's door some time later.


End file.
